I am what I am. Let me be as what I am.

Let me be as what I am.

I am what I am.

Change me not.

Condition me not.

Push me not.

Pull me not.

Hold me not.

Scold me not.

I am what I am.

Let me be as what I am.

Right I am for what I am.

Wrong I am for what you think I am.

Right or wrong

Decides not what I am.

I am what I am.

Let me be as what I am.

My follies make me what I am.

My mistakes are the fun I have.

Learns me not from all I have.

That’s what makes me what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Family,

Friends,

Brother,

Sister,

Husband,

Son,

Though I have.

Count me not

as a sheep or cattle

living and grazing in herd.

Shepherd I need not

to tend my life.

Individual I am.

I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Bog me not

with the societal pressure.

Force me not into the apologetic confessions

of my blunders.

Scare me not

with the duty sermons.

Burden not my shoulders

with the onus to uphold

the family name.

Trust me not

to maintain your fame.

I am what I am.

Let me be as what I am.

Lame I am.

Lazy I am.

Fickle I am.

Insane I am.

Dork I am.

Take me as what I am.

Or let me be as what I am.

Understands me not

what you say.

Because my thoughts

makes me what I am.

I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Rebel daughter I am,

Unruly wife I am.

Careless mother I am.

Impolite sister I am.
Impractical lover I am.

Unworthy friend I am.

I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Risks I take.

Botches I make.

Impulsive are my decisions.

Messy are my mind creations.

But I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Weeps I hard.

Laughs I harder.

My adrenaline swings

between zenith and nadir.

People you are

I know.

You can’t take it farther.

I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Swims I in the mountains,

Climbs I the water.

Touches I the sunlight

Basks I in the moonlight.

Weird I am.

But I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Lonely I am.

Friendly I am.

Weak I am.

Strong I am.

Scary I am.

Cheerful I am.

Trustworthy I am.

Bitch I am.

I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

Changed me everyone a lot.

Rebounded me back to what I am.

Force not me to be what I am not.

Because I am what I am.

So let me be as what I am.

A Dream come True!

        
Finally my dream has come true. Yes! A bookshelf! All I dreamt of these years was for a bookshelf! And it's here! Thanks to Rethesh for procrastinating my urge for 8 long years. A bibliophobe I guess. Sigh! Anyway, do you see that above? That’s my bookshelf with assorted books gathered over a period of time. My Books! What should I say? They are my love, my friend, my companion in distress!  And much more. God? May be! It won’t be an exaggeration if I say so.

I vividly remember, the time when I had started developing interest in books. It was somewhere post my schooling and pre my college, i.e. 11^th grade. Credit goes to the very own Rajitha Subramaniam aka Raji, my childhood friend!  The fact remains that she introduced me to books with Sidney Sheldon though … Ahem! :P  Moving on, if I say, the universe had conspired to show the true colors of the genes I belong to, it won’t be a dramatic overture … Yes my father’s genes! Like daughter like father Or should I say like father like daughter? I guess the latter is right.  You will never see a bibliophile as him.  He too had dreamt of all his life for a huge library all for himself with assorted books for him to read and savor. He too had dreamt of saving his retirement life for reading only. Alas! His vision betrayed him. Anyway, I still buy him books, which, to my surprise, he reads with the zeal of a child. However, I must confide, I never gathered inspiration from him during my childhood and the zest was only developed after reading Mr. Sheldon, may be the teenage curiosity you know :P . However, I wholeheartedly thank my father and Raji for contributing their bit to make me a good reader, rather a bibliophile for days and years to come. Weren’t it for them, I wouldn’t have known what a book can offer — Joy, sadness, pleasure, tension, peace, depth, knowledge, orgasm :D — all that makes a human human! 

While I jot my feelings away, my bookshelf stands right in front of me tall and sturdy, telling me there’s more to add here! And a satisfied smile is all I have!

In the Search of Love …

Leaving the soul behind,
I traveled the heights of Himalaya,
Swam the depths of Ganges,
Crossed the vastness of Sahara,
In the search of love.

Walked I,
Through the thorny scrubs of Deccan,
The labyrinths of Sundarbans,

Eerie alleys,
Green meadows,
Bustling Metros,
I meandered through all!

Alas!
Love hid itself,
Amid the obscurity of denseness.

Muddled thoughts,
Hopeful soul,
With no heart to budge.
A bleak remembrance of
Grandma’s tales,
Traversed me
To another land
To witness Aphrodite,
The epitome of love.
Yet …
Feelings of mine,
Didn’t get any dope.

Dispirited,
My foot strolled me,
Back to the soul,
Where my existence reside.

Epiphany it was!
To feel the dope of love
In the soul I left behind.